Confession:  I adore having my nails freshly painted and perfect. Adore. I mean it is basically one of the top 3 things I do not want to leave the house with out. It is that serious to me. Problem. I absolutely loathe getting mani’s and pedi’s.

Yes, I realize that is a sacrilegious thing to some of you, and I do love being primped and pampered as much as any girl – but the hour it takes me sitting in the salon getting worked on drives me totally bananas. Not relaxing at all – torture. I have SOOOOOO many other things I should be doing than stuck sitting with my feet in water! So, as much as it breaks the girl code – I usually take some kind of work along. (Don’t hate!) 🙂

(Oh dear Lord – and if you are thinking “do it yourself at home” then you have no idea the extent of my non-coordination!)

Recently I realized to late I had nothing work related to do so in order to attempt to keep from obsessing over how much time I was wasting I decided to do something even more tawdry and picked up a magazine from the rack.

And here is the magazine:

Stars Without Makeup! What Hollywood’s most beautiful really look like.

Now really. Seriously. Magazines take the most unflattering photos of beautiful women they can find – who knows if the distort them even more – and put this on the front page? And expect us to pick it up and even care??

So, in the interest of research I sat aside my moral high ground and delved in. And yes, I’m ashamed. (The same feeling I get when I’m checking out of a grocery store and try to read the tabloid headlines from a distance and get caught… why do I even care who said what about whom? I certainly don’t believe it!)

A few months ago an actress made the news for tweeting a photo of her 40 plus year old face bare of any makeup. (This was NEWS people!?!)  In an interview they asked her what made her do that.

She explained that she had just finished an all day photo shoot where there were hours spent on hair and makeup and lighting and she knew it would still be airbrushed and “fixed” to be even more beautiful before the photos hit the stands. She simply wanted women to know what she really looked like.

I kinda admire that.

A recent study showed that people who use social media can become more depressed by their own lives when seeing all the status updates, photos etc. of people bragging on their perfect kids, adoring partners, exotic vacations…

It can all add up to making us forget that these venues offer the users an opportunity to decide which “face” to put out in public. And, I don’t know about you (well, I think I know about you – but I don’t want to sound like a ‘know it all’ – even when I am!) but given to choice to put up a cute pic of me verses an early morning, bedhead, stinky breath with gunk in my eye photo – I’d pick the cute one to make my profile photo.

This is not about airing dirty laundry or making private things public (we all have “that” person on our timeline!) – but it is about remembering that life is NOT a competition. That no one has it “all together all the time” and if we scurry around thinking other’s lives are perfect and try to measure up we will miss out on the special and unique joys of our own lives.

We all struggle. We all have days that just plain suck.
And so do others – even the ones really good at hiding it.

Personally, I like people who have some battle scars.
I find a gentleness… a grace… an understanding…
a sacred beauty in those who have survived something ugly –
and reach out in love to other’s who are hurting.

Your life may not always feel glamorous. It may not have turned out to be the fairy-tale you used to believe was the “goal.” But it is valuable. And, even messy, it is a beautiful precious thing. And the risk of taking off your mask and being authentic is about the most beautiful, brave and loving thing one human being can do for another.

Now, in a spirit of solidarity I will post a complete un-retouched, makeup free and naked photo of myself.

Marvelyne at 6 months

Oh come on – I said authentic… I did not say stupid 🙂