Tomorrow marks the 100 year anniversary of “Happy Mothers Day.”

And it seems to become a bigger deal each year. The commercials – the pressure – the demands… All for what most agree is an arbitrary, “made-up” faux holiday that benefits retail… A LOT! 

While for many, maybe even most of us, it’s homemade cards and breakfast in bed (complete with burnt toast and cold coffee!) and grocery store carnations and sticky kisses all equaling pure bliss. But for so many the day and the weeks leading up to it are a living torture

Please hear this part: Being a mom is one of the sweetest, most amazing things in my life! I love to celebrate with my moms, be celebrated by my kids (& husband!) and to celebrate other moms! I really, truly do! I don’t even mind cleaning up the spilled cereal covering the kitchen floor and wearing (in public) the atrocious, most gaudy fake flower earrings my three year old insisted were the best gift ever! It’s all part of the amazingly precious tapestry of having children. And I’m often left breathless by the pure beauty of this most intimate of relationships. I am beyond blessed.

And, personally, I LOVE Mother’s Day – because I love to be celebrated and made a big deal of and ohhhh how I adore breakfast in bed! So YES! Bring it on!

But I’ve witnessed up close the horrific pain that is far too often accompanied by the simple phrase, “Mother’s Day.”

I know women who find the weekend so miserable they avoid restaurants, shopping malls and even churches — because they are bombarded with reminders that just hurt so very much.

There are sooo many ways this “holiday” inflicts unspeakable agony.

The woman whose heart desperately, frantically wants to be a mom but her body stubbornly refuses.
The child whose mom has passed away.
The woman who has chosen not to become a mother and feels disapproval by others – as if she is banned from experiencing the “real love” club.
The woman with a broken relationship, a child who doesn’t / can’t / won’t communicate with her.
The single mom working two jobs and feeling like a failure because she can’t provide for her child the way she wants to.
The adult who has been broken and scared by an abusive or absentee mom.
The brave woman who made the sacred choice to give her child a better chance at life via adoption – but wonders if it was the right call.
The child in foster care who isn’t sure who to call mom – but dreams of this magical thing called, “a mother’s love” that everyone else seems to enjoy.
The beautiful woman who faced the unimaginable horror of kissing her child in a casket – and saying, “goodbye.”

And I’m sure there far to many more.

Now, I really do believe we should acknowledge, recognize and celebrate good moms!
And not only on a single Sunday in May but consistently.
With great delight!
With an abundance of joy!

So please, enjoy your day – I fully intend to cuddle up with my precious family and soak up the sweetness!

Just don’t forget those who suffer.

Let’s not be so self-absorbed that we don’t offer a compassionate ear to the hurting. A kind word. A hug. A moment to acknowledge to ourselves our own blessing while we take some time to comfort those who mourn – and remember the things in life that are really most precious.

To my beautiful, amazing mom, to my generous, loving mom-in-love… to my birthmom… To my beautiful daughter who is now teaching me about mothering… To all you admirable moms who make the choices to raise children with overflowing love and self-sacrifice… Happy Mothers Day! I hope you are celebrated richly!

And for all the women that this weekend is bittersweet for, or devastating for. I am holding you in my heart. I am thinking of you and wishing you peace and comfort. And I am praying for you, that out of your deepest pain you will find redemptive value and a path to wholeness.

Your title doesn’t matter. Your paternal status is not what defines you.
Your heart is.
And you are precious – you are valued – you are loved.